(CSF1b) Families II

This session features research on “the family” or family relations in relation to equity, diversity, and inclusion. Tags: Equality and Inequality, Parenting And Families, Work And Professions

Organizer: Amber Gazso, University of the Fraser Valley; Chair: Amber Gazso, University of the Fraser Valley

Presentations

Pedrom Nasiri, University of Calgary

Queer(y)ing the Quotidian: Non-Monogamous Families and the Potentiality of Queer Family Practices

In (2019[2009]) Cruising Utopia, Jose Esteban Munoz reminds us of the ideality of queerness. Rather than something that we are or might ever be, queerness is an educated mode of hope and hoping that encourages us to think and feel beyond the confines of our present moment – and its routinized and habituated practices – so that we might dream and enact better worlds. He suggests that, while this hope is future-oriented, it may nevertheless be found in quotidian practices of everyday life that overflow with cultural and affective surplus promising emancipatory possibilities. As Munoz articulates it, the queer utopian project is thus historically grounded and drawn to the anticipatory illumination of ideologies, embodied dispositions, and aesthetic practices that offer political hope against (hetero/homo)normativity. In this presentation, I draw on Munoz’s framing of queerness to interrogate the everyday social practices of non-monogamous families in Canada and the United States. Through original research consisting of 153 interviews of non-monogamous family members and 20 life documents (a multi-pronged qualitative research strategy that includes visual and textual data), I demonstrate the inherent tension in non-monogamous relationships as they work to both challenge and extend (hetero/homo)normative family practices.

Tori Yang, University of British Columbia

Reworking Identity, Reworking Heteronormativity: The Case of Tongqi in China

The experiences of wives of men who have sex with men (MSM) represent a marginalized and underexplored domain, particularly in non-Western contexts. Despite the decriminalization of homosexuality in 1997 and its subsequent removal from the list of mental illnesses in 2001 in China (Kong 2016), the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) community remains largely invisible in most parts of the country today (Wang, Hu, et al. 2020), shrouded by hostile public opinion (Lin 2023; Lin and Wang 2021). The immense pressure to marry and carry on family lineage often leads to situations where gay men enter marriages with heterosexual women without disclosing their sexual orientation, a practice that has given rise to the phenomenon of “ tongqi ” ( tongqi, an abbreviation for “wives of gay men” in mandarin Chinese). Research estimated that a staggering 13.6 million tongqis (Liu and Lu 2005), highlighting the complex social reality surrounding homosexuality, stigma, and the institution of marriage in China. Despite the prevalence of tongqis , there is limited understanding of how these women make sense of their marriage upon discovering their husbands’ same-sex behaviors/identity? In response to this gap, our study draws from semi-structured in-depth interviews with 34 heterosexual women unwittingly married to MSM in China, we aim to demonstrate how heteronormativity serves as a lens through which individuals construct and reconstruct their identities, navigating the challenges posed by the revelation of their husbands’ sexuality. In China, where the LGBTQ+ community and their families face societal invisibility and harsh judgment, our research sheds light on the intricate ways in which tongqis engage with heteronormativity to make sense of their experiences. Utilizing the heteronormativity framework through thematic analysis, three distinct frameworks that capture the nuances of tongqis ’ reactions to the sexuality disclosure. The first theme involves blaming oneself as the failed wife. The husbands homosexuality is interpreted as indicative of the womens failure to fulfill their gender roles adequately as "good wives." This perspective places the responsibility for resolution on the womans ability to adapt or change, reinforcing traditional gender norms. The second theme perceives the situation as a misfortune caused by some morally corrupt gay men. This viewpoint indicates that the predicament could be avoided if gay men prioritized honesty and sought companionship within their own communities, instead of potentially exploiting innocent heterosexual women. Again, this theme emphasizes the need for personal integrity and responsibility among gay men, reflecting a moralistic stance. The third theme signifies a shift in perspective where individuals look towards collective changes or personal betterment as a means of moving forward. This approach holds the potential to challenge heteronormativity, although such an outcome is not guaranteed. It represents a stance that seeks broader societal changes and personal growth. These patterns illustrate the multifaceted interplays between gender norms and sexual morality in shaping individuals’ sense of self. Importantly, they showcase how individuals either reinstate or challenge heteronormativity as they navigate the complexities of their identities within the context of a marriage affected by a husband’s undisclosed homosexuality/bisexuality. Beyond the specific focus on tongqis in China, our study contributes to the theoretical understanding of heteronormativity. Rather than conceptualizing heteronormativity as a static and monolithic concept, we emphasize its dynamic nature as a construct with which individuals creatively engage and rework. By unraveling the intricate ways in which tongqis negotiate their identities within the framework of heteronormativity, our research contributes to a more nuanced comprehension of the diverse ways individuals respond to and reshape societal expectations. This nuanced understanding is crucial in fostering empathy and advancing inclusive societal changes toward diverse sexual orientations and identities.

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Non-presenting authors: Hui Xie, University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee; Changhui Song, Henan Normal University

Sol Underwood, University of Toronto

Family the Kids Choose? Negotiating Gratitude for LGBTQI+ Ancestors and the Struggle to Sustain a Gay Community

Gay fathers comprise a new family unit in history. This research explores how belonging to a larger LGBTQI+ community matters to queer co-fathers. Based on analysis of 18 in-depth, semi-structured interviews with queer co-fathers, I show that these new family units express an ambivalence towards a ‘gay community’. On the one hand, they understand they are a ‘new social unit’ and pioneers in a gay community that owes great debts to their ‘gay ancestors’, while on the other, they are largely disconnected from and alienated from the contemporary gay community. Fatherhood transforms these men’s lives: their childfree LGBTQI+ friends no longer visit them, and they experience disconnects between gay culture, domestic, and family life: much of their social time is now spent with straight and cisgender parents, especially the parents of their children’s friends. Similarly, I explore fathers’ reflections on feeling abandoned by their gay community and how they do not necessarily need one. Finally, I explore the socioeconomic explanations for this disconnect. Fathers with greater economic resources can ‘opt out’ of community and compensate for necessary domestic labours by hiring domestic caregivers.

Krisha Mistry, University of British Columbia

"Mommy Issues": Exploring the Intersections Between Motherhood and Womanhood Admist Chronic Illness.

While the relationship between motherhood and womanhood has long been researched in the field of sociology, such work often neglects how chronic illness diagnoses may impact the formation of these identities. In my research, I explore how individuals understand and navigate the motherhood identity within the context of womanhood, with attention to how the diagnosis of a chronic illness impacts these intersecting identities. The data is based on two semi-structured qualitative interviews with a minimum of three participants. The first interview focuses on how women relate to the experiences of womanhood and motherhood, and the second focuses on how women navigate these identities with a chronic illness. The data of each participant is analyzed as an individual case study to account for the variety of illnesses presented. Moreover, by implementing this approach each participant represents a different story or perspective of motherhood. Combining narrative and sociological approaches allows for a deeper understanding of the individual motherhood experience and how this maps onto their journey/experience with chronic illness. Initially, I had planned to conduct a thematic analysis that identified common themes across all participants. However, during the data analysis stage, each participant presented with a different chronic illness and all had different journeys to motherhood, making it difficult to validate my data to its full extent. Instead, by taking a narrative case study approach common themes were identified across participants despite all having different journeys and experiences. For example, a common theme of “resilience,” emerged despite all participants having undergone acute mental and physical health challenges, they would often put aside their own needs for the better of their children because it was their ‘job’ as a mother. Furthermore, by doing so participants expressed a sense of external purpose that motherhood gave them. This further supports my hypothesis that despite having a chronic illness, the identity of motherhood gives participants an external sense of purpose, both shaping them as mothers and as women. For all participants interviewed, it was found that cultural background and familial, social, and cultural expectations strongly influenced the decision to become a mother, and this desire to become a mother overcame the challenges associated with their chronic illness. Despite this, an additional finding that emerged was to the understanding of chronic illness arose: chronic illness diagnoses are strongly associated with feelings of unworthiness and a distinct lack of fulfillment that transcends to participants’ understanding of both womanhood and motherhood identities. This research is incredibly important to both the field of medical sociology and sociology of the family because it highlights the variety of challenges women face when making the decision to become a mother. Additionally, this work demonstrates a foundational understanding of the ways in which a chronic illness may create both physical and mental health barriers to the experience of navigating motherhood. Moreover, this research provides insight for women with chronic illnesses themselves into the potential challenges they may face when making the decision of whether or not to embark on the journey of motherhood. This research also highlights the importance of providing resources and support to women with chronic illnesses and their families. Additionally, it emphasizes the need for further research into the unique needs of women with chronic illnesses and their families.